Everyone gets older, I act the same age

There are those moments in life when time reveals itself and you suddenly feel its passing.  Usually time only causes minor ripples evoking comments like “seems like time is flying by” or “could this day last any longer”, but occasionally time becomes more of a crisis and evokes more than just idioms.  For me these time crises come on birthdays.

This weekend was my birthday, so the usually flurry of emotions involving time passing arose: have I done enough with my life, where am I headed, damn I’m old, etc.  This weekend in particular was crisis worthy due to a wedding of high school friends – that are younger than myself.  It was an amazing wedding for two people who are truly in love and I wish Amanda and Dan luck even though I don’t think they need it.

Amanda and Dan with Josh presiding

Amanda and Dan with Josh presiding

Among my friends I am probably ahead of the curve when it comes to analyzing if your success is on track with your age, but when compared to my minds eye, I’m behind.  I have a steady job, but I’m not on the fast track, I have a fantastic girlfriend, but I’m not married, and I haven’t lived in a foreign country.  Some of these could be deemed positives depending on circumstance, but since I’m grading myself on what a young John would have thought, I’m failing.

Now the real question, do I care that I’m failing?  Ironically…no.  I worry myself on these days and then I move on.  Over and over again I was asked when Meaghan and I plan on tying the knot, but I don’t have a good answer for them.  I tell them that we’re not concerned about getting married, which then prompts them to ask why that is and I give some bull about neither of us having a high opinion of marriage, but the truth is I have no idea why.  I just know that both of us are happy and don’t want to rock the boat.

In talking with Dan on the night before his wedding I articulated the response in a new way that encompasses the feeling correctly.  I enjoy waking up and knowing that the person beside me is there without obligation and without contract.  That person could leave at any time but doesn’t because this is exactly where they want to be.  At this moment in my life that’s exactly what I want – to be wanted.  There will be time down the road to choose security over self-esteem.

This road may not be what young John had envisioned, but when I go to sleep, it’s calm and peaceful sleep.  If my parents are concerned that I’m a 27 years old without a college degree, unmarried, and without children then too bad, because I learned it from my dad.  He always told me “you can grow older, but you don’t have to mature” and I was always taught to say yes sir, yes ma’am, and mind your parents.

Written by John in: Ramble | Tags: , , ,

Can I get an amen

Finally, finally, finally.  I hoped it would happen, but I didn’t know if the rest of the country was ready for a black president.  I’m happy, not only for President Elect Obama, but for myself because in 40 years I can say I was there and I voted for Barack Obama.

Most of my memorable life has been filled with national disappointments.  Nobody landed on the moon, no wars ended well, no civil liberties were granted.  Those are my parents’ and grandparents’ stories and I’ve been jealous.  Well no more.

McCain gave a very humble concession speech and then Obama gave yet another fantastic speech as he accepted our highest office.  Now my only regret is that we must wait two months while W. trashes the white house and makes last minute policy decisions.

Even as we celebrate, the most daunting task of our lifetime lays before us.  I am proud that I was part of this change not only in leadership, but also in the outlook of our nation.  American apathy towards politics and leaders plagued us for too long and we are just as guilty as the politicians for the present circumstances.  More of us could have protested, more of us could have turned out at previous elections, and more of us could have donated time to improving our communities.  For too long we have felt hostage to our leaders.  Well no more.

The burden of improving this country lies not only with our leaders, but also with each individual.  I will be doing what I can to take the momentum from this election and contribute in everyway I can.  I will volunteer when I can, support businesses that value their employees and environment, and voice my concerns when poor policies are being made.

There is one thing that everyone can do without any effort.  Just understand that we live in consumer driven society and that every dollar is a vote.  Companies count your “votes” and from those tallies they will deliver the products and services you want.  When you pay $5 for tabloid magazines you are voting for vanity and exploitation.  Purchasing a BMW M3 over a Ford Focus means you care $50,000 more about what kind of car you drive than your children’s education or your favorite charity.  When you pay extra for US versus foreign made products you are supporting the American worker.  Each of us has a limited number of votes and where you choose to spend those votes will help determine what kind of jobs, economy, and policies we have.

All right, diatribe over.  Now lets just look forward to turning this great day into a great era.

Written by John in: Politics | Tags: , , ,

Powered by WordPress | Aeros Theme | WordPress Themes | Copyright All Rights Reserved.